Listening to YES 933 after listening to Kiss 92 and Hot FM for these weeks. Feels good to hear some songs that used to accompany me through the bad times.

It's amazing how music helps us isn't it? Our feelings are sung with words which in turn allows us to realise how we really feel with the emotions being described... It's the same as someone sympathizing and understanding how we feel. Sometimes we don't need advices at all, maybe just something that will make us feel better? Like there is something 'there' for us. I believe that for every period of sadness, the main reason we can get over it and become a better person is through individual healing, and sometimes with aid of external factors, like music or just the presence of someone close...

Just some thoughts while listening to music and forgetting about my IT stuffs.
I've been feeling good about myself for quite long now, no worries, as for those who knew me know that I get upset really easily and my self-esteem used to be really low, and can still be low sometimes. And that I used to cry a lot lol?

I know that nothing I've in the past can compare to what I have now, except for my family whom I treasure more than anything else in the world since forever, and also G and X who has walked with me till this day. I am really fortunate, because currently I have all of them, together with Liang YY.
He might not be the most romantic person ever, but the things that he taught me, the feelings that he made me me feel, the very small things he says and does and the laughter and tears that was present since I knew him -- they are priceless.

He is not romantic, but he buys me things he thinks that I like, brings me to places that I love and tries to do things for me despite being sleepy and despite it being totally not necessary nor compulsory. I have mood swings and attitudes that are not at all desirable and even I, myself wouldn't be able to tolerate, but he'll find ways to cheer me up or just tolerate it, even though he shout at me at times because I am really being unreasonable.
His general knowledge is very wide -- unless I ask things like girls fashion, new kpop songs etc., most probably he will be able to answer any question I throw to him, being the inquisitive me. I've improved myself in the way I behave in public. In the past, there's this standard line, "I am me thus I can behave anyway I want, no one can stop me." that always come out of the mouth, and it's gone, because in the real world, you can't do or say anything you want if you want to get along with everybody else. I tend to understand and learn the ways to bring myself across in a more 'grown-up' way, improving my daily life's etiquette etc.
Whenever I complain stuffs at work, among cliques or family conflicts to him, he'll listen to me and ask me not to care and make me feel better by doing funny things and making me laugh (though at times he'll just turn a deaf ear because I always complain about lil stuffs).
He is not the hot and cold kind. Although the honeymoon period is wayyy over, he still treats me well, and dotes on me with small gestures like a peck on the cheek when I fell asleep before him every night, pats on my head randomly, and sometimes he'll play around and tease me like we're still 15 y/o or something. He packs supper for me some of the nights after his work, and even prepares fruits for me for my next day's lunch. Things like that are what I enjoy and appreciate the most when I am together with him...

I always tell him that it's not what he buys me and where he brings me that make me the happiest -- it's the fact that he's the one buying the things for me and that I went to those places and countries with him.

We might not be the happiest couple on the earth, we quarrel every so often but never do we carry the quarrels with us through or over the night. We have our fair part of happiness, simple happiness.  We have this bond between us, both understanding the importance of ourselves in each other's lifes -- I think that's enough for me. I'm prepared to walk on the rest of my life with this guy.

Back to work, toodoooos.

I think that I've taken this test before... From a school's email to earn CE points or something? I think the results are different from the one I have now. So anyway... This is so true. I am INFP -- Introverted iNtuitive Feeling Perceiving. 

"INFPs never seem to lose their sense of wonder. One might say they see life through rose-colored glasses. It's as though they live at the edge of a looking-glass world where mundane objects come to life, where flora and fauna take on near-human qualities."

"Their extreme depth of feeling is often hidden, even from themselves, until circumstances evoke an impassioned response."

"Of course, not all of life is rosy, and INFPs are not exempt from the same disappointments and frustrations common to humanity. As INTPs tend to have a sense of failed competence, INFPs struggle with the issue of their own ethical perfection, e.g., performance of duty for the greater cause. "

"Introverted Feeling
INFPs live primarily in a rich inner world of introverted Feeling. Being inward-turning, the natural attraction is away from world and toward essence and ideal. This introversion of dominant Feeling, receiving its data from extraverted intuition, must be the source of the quixotic nature of these usually gentle beings. "

More personality tests \(^.^)/

As usual not doing much stuff even till now at 11.21am. I wish every day is like yesterday where I can completely focus on the codes from 1pm-6pm straighttt.

Anyway, my reason for blogging suddenly is because I read back some of the blog posts from the old blog... And I find that I was so brutally honest in those blog posts and Im like such a complicated girl who always find fault in herself?! But somehow it was a good thing because the me during those times was selfless and always put others before herself... It's weird that we always refer our past self as a third-party right?

So... I am actually thinking that it is a good habit to blog and describe every day's life in details like how I always did, because I know the future me will be amazed like I am now with the past me. And since I refuse to do anything now being the procrastinator I am, I shall indulge in this private world of mine. Heh.
(Yes it is private in some ways because people only read blogs that belong to popular people nowadays, with amazing life and people blogs to become popular, yes?)

PSI is current 198 now, it's the number 1 topic this week? Reached super early at 8.20am at the office door when no one was in the office. Packed my usual breakfast chicken pao and coffee next door and until someone arrived, washed my apple to eat together with the pao and coffee~ Now I cannot wait to eat my strawberries, blackberries and don't know what more berries are there in the lunchbox prepared by YY! Hehe but I went to the toilet thrice due to my heavy breakfast.

So the colleague who sat next to me (or behind me) quitted yesterday, and Illah, my RP intern mate is on MC. Well, boring.

Just a sudden thought, I always thought I sorta like programming... But then again, I realise I don't since internship, because I cannot do it. I mean like, yes it is a challenge and I should like it, but I do not like the useless feeling of not being able to get things done around a bunch of IT professionals, and make me see clearly how long a journey I have to go before reaching the 'level' of knowledge where my colleagues are now. And I am obviously not talented in IT, maybe in school I just persevere slightly more than others thus being able to complete things at a slightly higher speed? Or maybe I'm just plainly lazy during internship. However I will still study more towards building websites with minimal object-oriented programming... Er that is some sort of IT language. I just lose all confidence to complete my codes thus the slacking...

Still unsure of what I want to do in future, but currently I'm thinking of taking part-time degree and working part-time at the pet shop of bf's sis? I really think that it's pointless working a full-time office job, getting stressed up and unhappy everyday and having little quality time to self until you're old... Then you die. Not to mention not being able to take care of my future kids well? 

Well shall see how. Because the last I remembered, I quitted school and wanted to work since then till the rest of my life :P See how it changed? 

Ok now gtg to have some quality retail therapy. These codes are making me so full of angst (?). Oh, adding on, what the Indonesian minister said about the haze, "This is not what the Indonesian nation wants, it is because of nature.", as if the trees set fire to themselves. I don't mind about the comment about Singapore being all childish because the comment itself tells us how he win us all in being 'like children', when he can actually be silent and take some actions instead

By the way, it's 4.19pm now hahaha 5-6 hours taken to procrastinate somemore and complete my blog post.

toodoooooooooos~